Although it might not be as great as Professor Walker and his kissing assignments, and his take on love, and his weekly readings of ee Cummings -- it's still a favorite this semester: Comms 411.So far, some of our assignments have been: watch a scary movie and take our pulse throughout the film; observe others playing video games for an hour and notice any behavioral differences; explain if and when the "birds and the bees" talk came from an incident involving the media (thank you Friends) and the list goes on and on, and I love it. You might think it sounds easy, but we have two essays a week. Which to some of you might still sound easy. And it might be. But if you're taking Sociology 300/Stats at the same time, it's not. I love this class. So if you're at BYU - take Comms 411: Media Effects/Professor Thomsen. Amen.
Back to why I'm writing about this though: Our next assignment asks us to think about what influenced our idea of romance, before actually dating. I've said it before: A Walk to Remember takes the cake -- because as a seventh grader, that movie might as well be called: The Greatest Love Story Ever Told.
I thought about any other experiences that might have shaped any of my own ideas growing up, and this is kind of a tangent, but I remember in the fifth grade when one of my classmates told me he had kissed another one of our classmates for five hours! Five hours? I think that is humanly impossible, especially for a fifth grader. But I believed it, and probably even thought that was romantic, too.
Anyway, the final part of the project is ask others where their idea of romance came from? I've already bothered classmates in my other classes today, so since I'm working on my essay at the moment, I decided to get online and ask anyone who may still read this blog of mine:
Where do you think you you learned all the information you know about dating and romance? What had the biggest impact on what you think is normal?
If you really take the time to answer, you're my new best friend.
PS.
Speaking of Romance...
Shout out to my friend Jalene who I adore, and her photography I adore just as much. Be sure to check out her latest contest here and enter to win full wedding day coverage from an amazing photographer! If I happen to be planning a wedding one of these days (and I just might!) this would be a dream come true. So be sure to check this out!
PSS.
thank you, THANK you for all your responses/insight! i appreciate it so, so much. thank you!
12 comments:
I think I was influenced by Walk to Remember as well but mostly by Pride and Prejudice. Oh, and my parents. They are a huge part of why I think of romance as I do. But mostly Pride and Prejudice (the 2005 movie) and Austen's books. Hope that helps some!
Disney movies. I think they ruined me for life actually... because that was what I expected. But now that I'm a little bit older, I look to propehts, and general authorities, and other people in the church and I learn from their relationships. It has helped me to learn what true love can really be like, and how I can nurture my own relationships.
I still love Disney movies... but I'd take the kind of love the prophet has for his wife any day... a real life fairytale!
P.S. Kels- I love your blog!!! And I love you! :D
mk and ash movies did it for me. falling in love on vacation while solving a mystery? yes please! i watched every single one at least twenty times. consequently id say i'm pretty cheesy and i most definitely believe in love at first sight.
all 7 of my sibs got married while i was pretty young so im sure that played a part too. dreaming of a wedding and watching fotb were a daily occurrence for me.
I don't know if it was one certain movie or book that crafted my view of romance.. I think it was all of them. I adore love stories. I read this series a few years ago called Diary of a Teenage Girl Series by Melody Carlson and the Caitlyn books really inspired me to be more pure and guard my heart and not give it to first boy who calls me cute or has an adorable smile. Not saying this has been exactly easy..
I'm sixteen and I still think that fairy tales do happen. Yes. There will be rough patches. There will be fights. There will be hard times. But somehow or another, it's going to work out and be more than I could have dreamed. Perfectly imperfect. :)
Childhood favorites include: The Little Mermaid, Boy Meets World, The Parent Trap, 7th Heaven, Lizzie McGuire.. etc.
i had seen a walk to remember numerous times but one particular night i watched it alone in my room and it was a major turning point in my life. i don't think i have ever cried harder during a movie. ever. it was so sad, so heartfelt, so true, so beautiful and so full of love that i was sobbing uncontrollably. i fell in love with that movie that night and i truly think no other movie about love has topped it.
is it weird that media seems to be a big part of love & dating and my thoughts on it? i mean, i sort of feel like i haven't learned much about dating in my own life just yet. yes i have had crushes and gone on a few dates but nothing really stands out as the pivotal moment. the cloesest i have ever been to having true romance in my life is now - and we're at a "just friends" stage. i am obviously no expert when it comes to love and dating boys. but you know what? i'm a hopless romantic at heart and like i said, it's the books, movies, music & television shows that did it to me. that & this talk elder scott gave. that right there is true love. so i guess you could say i learned about true love & romance throught the beautiful examples of others.
I wouldn't say that movies completely shaped my views on love. I mean if I didn't say that a love like Allie and Noah's from The Notebook didn't have some sort of effect I would be lying. But I think that I have made views on love by those around me. My parents, friend's parents, married friends, etc. I take a little from each, and mold to what I feel is best for me. Is that weird?
I think what had the biggest effect on me was Dirty Dancing (I secretly watched it when I was about 8 years old) and pretty much every Disney film I ever watched
The Disney films are the reason I grew up thinking that you find one person and they're your prince and that you'd get married and live happily ever. I do still believe in soulmates, so they had a bigger influence than I thought.
Dirty Dancing just made me fall in love. I've watched that movie so many times and I still have that fluttery heart feeling when Johnny says that nobody puts baby in a corner. It's what I expect from relationships now, someone who would never let you be forgotten or pushed aside, who comes back to dance the last dance with you. They pushed each other in a scary way but it made them better. I owe a lot of how I treat relationships now to that film. :)
Totally from the media. It's pathetic, really.
I've always wanted to fall in love over email--Kathleen Kelly style. I wanted to find a boy like Cory--he just loved Topanga so much.
I remember feeling shocked that kissing in real life wasn't really what it looked like on t.v. and in movies.
I will say that as I've experienced real-life romance, it has become a million times better than what the media told me it was. A million times better.
10 Things I Hate About You. Heath did it for me. I remember seeing that for the first time when I was at my best friend's house and feeling so cool haha. And looooving it from the beginning. I think it showed the WAY dramatic version of ups & downs of relationships (wayyyyyy over dramatized of course and so not real life)
But the media is definitely where I think everyone gets the notion of what romance is "supposed" to be like... I definitely thought some hot Aussie was supposed to sing Can't Take My Eyes Off Of You in front of the entire school.... ;)
The influence for love came from a few places for me. I saw movies with crazy love stories, meeting one minute, a stolen kiss the next and then flying across the country to be with them. I wanted to believe it but something inside me didn't. I think it was because I was surrounded by real people who were in love. My parents, my extended family and people in my ward. I remember watching BBC's Pride and Prejudice and thinking that I wanted that. I wanted to completely detest someone and then fall madly in love with them. But something deeper from that movie (and book, obviously) is that love is acquired when you open your eyes. You have to look beyond the surface, accept their flaws and believe in someone. Normal is not hating someone and then falling in love with them. It's not normal to have one night stands or fall in love in 2 hours. But is is possible to have heavenly moments with a spouse or boyfriend. It's possible to look into someone's eyes and melt. It's possible to look back on the last 6 months of your newly married life with wonder. It's possible to see those 6 months as hard, eye-opening and humbling. That's normal.
Like Brittany and many others, the media has probably had the most effect on my knowledge of romance, especially in forming my ideas of it.
Disney movies like Aladdin and Beauty &the Beast taught me about the importance of falling in love with the person that you find yourself falling in love with, even if you don't know that he's a prince, because then it will make the surprise that much better. :)
Then, the Princess Bride. I love this love story for all its quirkiness and because Wesley and Buttercup are true to each other always. Following the Princess Bride comes You've Got Mail, a tale of initial hate that develops into friendship which develops into romance, which I think is probably the most realistic.
At the same time, I think we all know that the media presents an unrealistic portrayal of romance and love. So why is it such a huge part of my life? No one knows, but the most important thing is not to judge real life love and romance based on what you saw in a movie. Because, from what I've heard from real-life friends and family, real life romance is so much better.
p.s. i love love love your blog.
Post a Comment